Firstly, I know you voted for a Sunday blog and I am late. I’m sorry.
Secondly, I feel like I should explain why it’s late (and not only because it’s the foundation of today’s post)…
My blog is a day late because in the winter all I want to do is hibernate so, yesterday, I did just that, put the tree up and got cosy. Does anyone get what I mean? I post less on social media, I am less likely to do anything after work, I always want to be snuggled up with blankets and tea… Basically, I am not a social butterfly in winter.
I want to say that I think this is completely okay. It’s scary when you first start to sneak into yourself and want your own space a lot more, especially if you have suffered with depression in the past. When I start getting the urge to withdraw, I immediately think that there must be something wrong with me mentally. I realise now that there isn’t, this is not a sign of depression, this is what I am like when it’s dark and rainy all the time. This is what a lot of humans are like.
I guess what I wanted to say was I am feeling the pressure this Christmas, much like Christmas’s passed, to be extremely social all the time and not hibernate, also to be slim for my party dresses but to also be down to say “f*ck it, it’s Christmas” around food and alcohol.
Do you want to know what I say to all this pressure?
I say, “no, thank you, I’m going to do Christmas my way” and by that, I mean;
1. No saying yes to parties I do not want to attend… or anything I do not want to attend, for that matter
2. No starving myself with Christmas diets to fit into a party dress, it’s much easier (and more fun and less damaging mentally) to just buy an outfit that I love and that fits me as I am
3. No diagnosing myself with mental health issues just because I don’t want to go outside in the cold, wet and dark (the more I talk about this, the more I actually think this is pretty sane…)
4. No to abusing my body with too much food and alcohol just because “it’s Christmas”. I will definitely enjoy my food and drink, I always do, but I refuse to consistently over eat because my body won’t thank me for it
5. No to anything that doesn’t serve me or make my soul happy
What I am not saying is that it’s okay to cancel things with friends last minute (maybe once or twice, if really, really needed, but definitely not consistently). What I am saying is that you should look after yourself and say no to things you don’t want to do in good time. Nobody wants to be called flaky or an arsehole for cancelling at the last minute all the time.
I’ve been that person and it hurts much more to be called “flaky” or a “let down” than the look on someone’s face when you say no when you’re first invited. Now, if I am unsure about something or am tempted to cancel last minute, I get really honest with myself and the host about why and that is always met with a much more loving and understanding response.
But I digress, kind of, this is just a long winded way of reminding you that you do not have to do anything you don’t want to do this Christmas 🎄
What are you going to be saying no to this year?
I am actually going to do another bite sized blog this week about Christmas and why I think presence is much more important than presents… Drop back to my blog site if you’d like to read that.